WORDS ARE A POWERFUL STEP in Military Spouse Success Stories

I’ve worked with hundreds of military spouses who were ready to begin their own paths to success, and I’ve found that many of these spouses develop the same skillsets. They engage in the art of positive self-talk, avoid gossip, maintain grateful attitudes, and seek out books, classes, and positive conversations to attract success effortlessly.

You can do this too!

The first step to self-fulfillment is becoming aware of the power of words, both those that we use and those that surround us. There is a strong connection between our inner thoughts and our spoken words and actions. Shield yourself from pessimists and seek out people who support your dreams. If you don’t like the language you are using or hearing, change your thinking. Your actions and success will follow.

I recently learned that harnessing positive thought is a continuous learning process. It becomes fun, however, once you begin to notice the connections between thought, speech, action, and success.

I am a life coach and, while helping my clients create their own ideal lives, I realized that I wasn’t focusing enough on my own language. This understanding led me to start making a conscious effort to pay more attention to my words.

No matter how practiced we are in nourishing positive thoughts, we can all use this moment to reflect and consider how we can improve our mindsets through our word use. This list is for all of us.

Read through the tips that I have gathered from conversations with my clients regarding what they feel best sets them up for success. Then let me know which tips help you the most on your path toward health, wealth, and more rewarding relationships. Remember, the words swirling around in our heads and the heartfelt conversations we engage in have a big impact on who we are becoming.

Tip #1 Live Without Regret

When we think back on our lives, there are often a few things we would like to have done differently. Instead of dwelling on these things, however, try giving them a positive spin. Think about how you can embody these desires today and how you can change your inner monologue into something positive.

For example, I’ve always wished that I had spent a year abroad in college. In fact, I sometimes feel envious of my college friend Rebecca, who spent a semester studying art in London. However, by digging deeper I can turn this “regret” into something positive like reading about interesting places and making plans to travel in the future. I choose not to dwell on what I would like to have done differently and instead focus on creating a life in the present that is free of regrets.

You are the author of the story of your life—write and speak your desires into reality. Keep your life vision and goals in the forefront of your mind so that your words will closely follow.

Tip #2 Appreciate Where You Are  

One great way to quickly attract your ideal future is to appreciate where you are today.

For example, my husband is an elementary school teacher who is certified in administration. Someday, he will probably get a job as an educational consultant but, right now, he appreciates the opportunity to be in the classroom with his young students. Enjoying their eagerness and his impact on their academic success is so meaningful to him that, while he has one eye on the next step in his career, a big part of him is simply enjoying every moment.

Sometimes, people focus on where they are headed at the expense of enjoying their current lives. Or, perhaps they worry too much about past choices instead of just being in the present and expressing gratitude for how far they’ve come. Keep in mind that gratitude in the present breeds more positivity in the future.

Tip #3 Encourage Others

You can encourage people with enthusiasm and positivity instead of criticism. Why not bless others with words that raise their spirits? By encouraging those around you with positive speech, you’ll find that you’re helping yourself along the way.

A great step toward positive self-talk is practicing speaking in an optimistic manner with others. Try complimenting a stranger today and see how good it makes you feel. Try noticing the wonderful things that your kids have done instead of just focusing on the negative, and strive to encourage rather than discourage them. Remind your spouse of your unconditional love. The next time you hear people gossiping about someone, consider sticking up for that person and shifting the conversation toward something more uplifting.

Cultivating a more positive outlook will not only help others, but will also lead to clearer thinking, increased creativity, and effortless success.

Tip #4 Speak Expectantly 

When you have a clear vision regarding the lifestyle you want, the universe will support the fulfillment of your wishes and you will begin to move more rapidly along the path to success. When something occurs that initially seems like a hurdle, try speaking about it aloud as though it is merely a new opportunity. You will find that your thoughts follow your expectant speech.

My coach, Amy, is wonderful at reminding me to keep up this spirit of expectancy. Last week, she noticed me complaining about my trainer leaving just as I was beginning to enjoy working out with him. She stopped me and had me switch up my language. I practiced harnessing expectant, positive speech, saying, “Well, my great trainer left. That’s interesting, universe…there must be something else wonderful in store for me. I wonder what it is?” My newly curious attitude led us to a wonderful brainstorming session that helped me develop a new workout routine that aligns with my ideal lifestyle.

I now use this kind of language every time that I feel stuck, and I’m able to talk myself right back on track. Once you are clear about what you want, you can more easily see all of the steps that will lead you there.

Tip #5 Surround Yourself With Success

When you are really clear on your life vision, it becomes easier to say “yes” to things that align with it and “no, thank you” to things that don’t. It also becomes easier to move forward when you limit your time with people who drain you while actively surrounding yourself with positive people who can help you reach your goals. When you know what you want, you will attract support and encouragement.

I work with a coach who helps me notice which activities keep me positive and which activities and people drain me so that I can meet my needs in a healthy way. Because my life vision includes having a positive impact on the military spouse community, I also read many books about coaching and take coaching classes to improve my skills. Reading and then journaling about what you read is a great way to have conversations with authors who inspire you.

Regardless of the format you chose, make sure the conversations with yourself and others support your success. By harnessing positive and productive speech, you will find that your thoughts follow, helping you to maintain an optimistic attitude. This positivity and expectancy will greatly contribute to your life’s journey and your overall success.